In today's society, we have made it entirely too easy to leave. Relationships, jobs, friendships, memberships, etc. But today's post is about relationships, specifically marriages.
It seems that whenever there is a problem or something bad happens, the easy answer is to leave. It makes me wonder what has changed over the years, because it wasn't always like this. You got married once and you stuck it out, you made it work, you dealt with your problems instead of running from them. Til death do us part actually meant something!
I knew growing up that I wanted to get married once and that was it. And I can't say that my journey to marriage was easy. I had my share of relationships: good, bad, and ugly. And I had my share of guys that I thought I wanted to marry. Looking back, I can very easily say I'm happy I waited to get married. I was 34 when I finally tied the knot. Took me long enough, right?
Here's the thing though...our relationship has been far from perfect. We've certainly had our bumps and bruises and what we are going through now is most certainly not something I would have EVER dreamed of going through. And yes, the easy answer for me is to leave, to walk away. But let's be real...nothing worth having is ever easy. Ever.
God works in mysterious ways sometimes. We don't always understand it, we don't always want what's happening to us, but I know that His plan for my life is so much greater than anything I could ever imagine. And that's no different now in my current situation.
I don't know about you, but I don't want the easy route. Leaving would be the easy thing to do. But I would ALWAYS wonder what if...I would always wonder if I made the right choice or the best choice. I believe that marriage is about two people working together with God at the center of your relationship. And that's what we are doing.
Bad things are always going to happen. Nobody's life is going to be perfect or full of sunshine and butterflies. And when we run away from relationships, when we take the easy route, we never learn to deal with our problems or how to grow and mature as a person. In many instances, we end up repeating the same habits and relationship problems time and time again. Why? Because we don't learn anything by leaving!
Is it fun to deal with the hard stuff? Is it fun to face your problems and/or your spouse's problems? Heck no. Not in any way, shape, or form.
But that's not the real question. The real question is...is it WORTH it?
When you look your problems in the face, when you work together with your spouse, you learn how to communicate and work through your problems together. You and your spouse grow as individuals and as a couple. And you learn to trust God and His plan, as well as how to trust you and your spouse.
Far too often, I've heard of people immediately taking the easy route and leaving at the first sign of a problem. And guess what they face in their next relationship? The exact same problems! Yep - they didn't learn anything by leaving and taking the easy route, so instead, they face the same stuff time and again. Because God puts us in the same situations over and over again until we LEARN from them! Shocking how that happens!
Now don't get me wrong...I'm not saying to stay if there is abuse or if there has been a series of trying to make it work but nothing is changing. What I am saying is to stick it out and work through it with your significant other...don't just run away at the first sign of a problem.
Sometimes God doesn't want us to have easy. Sometimes God wants us right in the middle of a storm so that we grow and learn to lean into Him when we need Him most. I know that I have...in the midst of everything going on, I have learned that His plan makes zero sense to me, but that it doesn't have to! He has me and my family and that's all I have to know.
What do you think? What would happen to marriages today if more people attempted to work things out before deciding to call it quicks? How would society be different? Look different?
Nothing in life is easy. Nothing worth having is easy.
If you are going through something difficult or are in hard times, know that you aren't alone. God is always there, even when you can't see Him or feel His presence.
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Have faith. Pray. And know you aren't alone.
I hope you have a beautiful week!
With love and wellness and lots of prayers,