I know I talk about this a lot, but seriously...communication really is key. Especially as you are planning your wedding. I know this, and Scott and I still had loads of communication issues, especially the week before our big day.
For some reason, I seem to think he can read my mind. That he should just know what I'm thinking and what I want, even when I don't say anything. Are all women like this? Because it certainly would make life easier if men could read our minds! Ha!
So...here's the thing with our wedding. We got married in our backyard. And months prior, we knew there was stuff that needed to be done to ensure the outside of our house looked the way we wanted it.
Well...you know how that works. Life gets in the way, and it rained the entire week he took off to get a lot of stuff done. So needless to say, he didn't get much done prior to the week of our wedding.
So instead of helping me with the stuff inside the house and prepping for the wedding, he was running around the week prior trying to get all the outside stuff done. And instead of me saying something to him, I just let it stew and fester in my head.
It also didn't help that he was shifted to night check for that week so he was working from about 1 to 10-ish each night. And his mom was coming into town that Wednesday.
Here we are on Tuesday...he's getting ready for work after doing whatever he was doing outside, and I exploded. I held it in long enough. I mean...I needed help on the inside of the house, prepping for his mom's arrival, plus we had the kids so I was running around picking them up and ensuring they got to where they needed to go.
And instead of asking for help, I assumed that he knew I needed help.
Oh man is all I have to say.
All of our fights have been because we didn't keep that line of communication open. Once we sit down and talk about (or explode at one another), we are back on the same page and everything is fine. The trick is learning to talk about it BEFORE the big explosions!
We are definitely getting better about it, but man oh man, that one was a doozy. We resolved it and were fine before he even left for work, but still. It certainly wasn't any fun.
We also had a bit of a fight the night of our rehearsal dinner...once again, because we weren't communicating with one another. That one was resolved very quickly without a huge blow-up (thankfully), and we enjoyed our wedding day, drama and argument-free!
My takeaway from this and for you is to make sure you are communicating with your significant other. There's nothing worse than assuming they know what you're thinking, and vice versa, and having a big fight because of it.
Scott knew I had wanted the stuff outside done; however, I didn't want him focusing solely on that the week prior to our wedding. We were having house guests and a ton of people in our house that week. I needed the help inside. So once again, we were operating on our own wants and needs, based on what we thought the other person wanted or needed.
Ugh. It can be an ugly cycle.
Don't let this be you. Ask your fiancé for help. Let them know where you could use the extra hand. The week before is going to fly by, just as the wedding day does, so make sure you aren't spending your time arguing with your future spouse.
Yes, it may be hard to ask for help...do it anyways. I promise, it will lead to smoother sailing as you head into your big day!
Have an awesome week! And happy wedding planning!
With love and wellness,