My mom had surgery last week. It doesn't sound like a big deal because I think we throw around that word...surgery...like its a miracle cure and it's no big deal. But it is a big deal. People every day don't make it out of their surgeries. My great grandma didn't when I was 14. I still remember that day clearly.
But back to mom...her surgery? It was to fuse her C-1, C-2, and C-3 in her neck together. She fractured both sides of her C-2 in a car accident in May. And the risks of the surgery? Paralysis or even death.
The night before the surgery was terrible. I didn't realize it then but I look back now and I remember thinking that I couldn't remember the last time I'd actually talked to my mom. Actually heard her voice. And I hadn't seen her since the accident.
As much as I tried to stay positive, my mind kept going to that dark place...kept saying to itself, "What if that last text is the last one you ever get from her? What if you didn't go visit her before her surgery and now you'll never see her again? What if you never get to hear her voice again?"
I had to get up 3 times to put on different oils before I was finally able to calm down and sleep. The oil that ended up working was the reassuring blend. I then prayed for peace and comfort knowing that my mom was in His hands. I could physically feel my body relaxing and my heart rate slowing down.
I didn't cry then. I didn't cry all day of the surgery as I was getting the updates. But at the end of the day, when I got the update that she was out of surgery, she was breathing on her own, and the surgery was successful by every metric, I just about lost it.
She was alive. She. Was. Alive.
We don't realize how fragile life is until something like this happens. We go about our daily lives almost taking it for granted.
Holy cow. Not anymore.
Say I love you. Tell people how you feel. Don't hold grudges. Make those phone calls. Take those trips.
Don't put off doing something because you may never get the chance to do that something.
Live your life to the fullest. Love with your whole heart. Take chances. Make memories.
I've spent this last week with my mom (minus a few days at Disney). We'd already had vacation plans to come visit her and it being right after her surgery worked out perfectly.
This was an eye-opening experience. And I can promise, I'm not going to waste my time here anymore. I'm going to live my life to the fullest extent possible. Because let's face it...life is short. And way too precious to just squander away.
With love and wellness,