April 14th, 2015

So many people believe that happiness begins with the possessions one owns or the people in their lives.  They think, “I’ll be happy when I have a better job,” or “I’ll be happy when I have a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/family/kids,” or “I’ll be happy when I make more money,” or “I’ll be happy when I live in a bigger house/have a better car, etc.”  Do you ever find yourself thinking that?

I know I’m guilty of it.  I work my current day job, plus have my health coaching and oils business on the side as my part time gig.  And I often think, “When I can quit my current day job and focus solely on my businesses, I’ll be happy/happier/more content.”  But how often does that actually work?  We rely on these statements/beliefs to make us happy, and in the meantime, we are miserable, all the while waiting for these amazing things to happen to us.

But what would happen if you changed your outlook?  What would happen if you said, “I am happy right now, in my present life and state of being,” regardless of what you’re doing or what you own or who is in your life?  What would happen if you stopped blaming your circumstances for where you are and how you’re feeling?  What would happen if you stopped blaming your parents, or your significant other, or your teachers from grade school?  What would happen if you took responsibility for your happiness?

This is such a profound question.  Because most people don’t realize that happiness begins and ends with themselves.  It all starts with their inner being and their thoughts and feelings.  Nobody else can control their happiness nor can anyone else provide your happiness.  Nobody “makes” someone else happy.  Everyone is responsible for their own happiness!!

Think how different the world would be if everyone thought this way!  If people stopped blaming one another and embraced their own happiness (or misery) as exactly that…their own!  And I’ll admit, it’s not always easy to do…it’s not easy to accept that how we’re feeling in any given moment is our own fault.  We want to blame someone else…anyone else for how we’re feeling.  We don’t want to believe that we feel a certain way solely because of ourselves.

But let’s put a stop to that.  Let’s take responsibility for how we feel.  Let’s change our mindsets.  For instance, I have to stop thinking that I will be happier when I quit my day job…because I am happy RIGHT NOW.  I have multiple things in my life that make me happy…I’m able to do exactly what I want because of that day job.  I’m able to start a business and focus on what I want to do because of that day job…without going into debt!  And how awesome is that??  How many people can say that?

And remember, every choice you make, every thought you have…you did that.  Nobody else.  So accept responsibility for your own actions and your own happiness.  And see how quickly your mindset and attitude changes.  Even better, see how quickly other people’s reactions to you change…because you aren’t blaming others or acting as a victim in your own life.  It’s amazing how this one little shift can alter your whole life.

What are some methods you’ve used to change this mindset and focus on your own happiness?  I’d love to hear about them in the comments.

With love and wellness,

Whitney

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