Sometimes we live in a world of blissful ignorance. We think we are happy. We think everything is "perfect" (as if there really is such a thing). And we think there couldn't possibly be anything wrong in our lives (relationships, marriages, jobs, etc.).
And one day, when we least expect it, the rug is ripped right out from under us. There is no warning. There is nothing to prepare us for what's to come.
And just like that, we are forced to handle what the world has thrown at us. Whether we like it or not.
In those times, there are so many thoughts that go through your head. You wonder if you're going to make it through, especially when it often feels as if you are barely keeping your head above water. And you wonder if the pain will ever stop...because the pain is so incredibly deep. And don't get me started on the confusion and heartbreak and fear...of the future, the unknown, of what is yet to come.
It hurts like hell. Because everything you thought was amazing was all just... not. And there is no manual for how to handle that kind of betrayal. Oh how I wish there was...but nope. Sorry! You gotta figure it all out on your own!
Here's the thing though. In those times, while it may feel like the world is ending and what you're going through is never-ending, you truly learn so much about yourself and the people in your life. While there may not be a manual or a perfect way of handling such situations, there is God and prayer and friends to keep you upright and putting one foot in front of the other.
It sounds crazy, but I am thankful for what this summer and situation has taught me. From learning about myself to learning about my friends (the ones who were [and still are] undeniably there for me) to learning about what exactly I wanted in this thing we call life.
So many people have said to me, "I don't know how you do it. You are so strong. I would be falling apart." The thing about it is...I wasn't given a choice. And it wasn't a matter of whether or not I could do it...I HAD to. I had to get up every morning and keep moving forward. I had to continue working and figuring things out. I had to be there for so many others, even when I didn't know how to truly be there for myself.
But...I also had to learn how to ask for help. How to humble myself to accept said help. I had to learn to truly lean on God when I didn't think there was any way things would work out. I had to learn to fully trust and accept that I was exactly where I was supposed to be, even if it didn't make any sense to me. And I had to learn to fully trust and accept that my friends, my true friends, were going to be there for me through thick and thin.
And while it certainly hasn't been easy by any means, it has been a season of growth. Spiritually. Mentally. Emotionally. And yes, even physically. And it's been a season of rebirth...of starting over. Of realizing my strength and using it to rebuild. To have the courage to know that it's okay to begin something new.
So yes...it didn't work out like I thought it would. And it 100% hurt like hell. But I am okay with that. I am happy at how this has changed me. And I am truly excited for what's to come.
Because truthfully...nothing will stop me now. I've been through hell and back, and I'm ready to take this life by the horns and enjoy everything it has to offer me.
So know that it may not always be easy, but it is always worth it. Wherever you are in life, whether it's good, bad, or ugly, just keep moving forward. I promise, it will one day be a thing of the past and you will be astonished at all you've accomplished.
I hope you have a beautiful week! And happy December!!
With love and wellness,
PS - living in blissful ignorance is NOT fun a place to be. Just a little FYI as you head into the week.