In today's society, we have made it entirely too easy to leave. Relationships, jobs, friendships, memberships, etc. But today's post is about relationships, specifically marriages.
It seems that whenever there is a problem or something bad happens, the easy answer is to leave. It makes me wonder what has changed over the years, because it wasn't always like this. You got married once and you stuck it out, you made it work, you dealt with your problems instead of running from them. Til death do us part actually meant something!
I knew growing up that I wanted to get married once and that was it. And I can't say that my journey to marriage was easy. I had my share of relationships: good, bad, and ugly. And I had my share of guys that I thought I wanted to marry. Looking back, I can very easily say I'm happy I waited to get married. I was 34 when I finally tied the knot. Took me long enough, right?
Here's the thing though...our relationship has been far from perfect. We've certainly had our bumps and bruises and what we are going through now is most certainly not something I would have EVER dreamed of going through. And yes, the easy answer for me is to leave, to walk away. But let's be real...nothing worth having is ever easy. Ever.
God works in mysterious ways sometimes. We don't always understand it, we don't always want what's happening to us, but I know that His plan for my life is so much greater than anything I could ever imagine. And that's no different now in my current situation.
I don't know about you, but I don't want the easy route. Leaving would be the easy thing to do. But I would ALWAYS wonder what if...I would always wonder if I made the right choice or the best choice. I believe that marriage is about two people working together with God at the center of your relationship. And that's what we are doing.
Bad things are always going to happen. Nobody's life is going to be perfect or full of sunshine and butterflies. And when we run away from relationships, when we take the easy route, we never learn to deal with our problems or how to grow and mature as a person. In many instances, we end up repeating the same habits and relationship problems time and time again. Why? Because we don't learn anything by leaving!
Is it fun to deal with the hard stuff? Is it fun to face your problems and/or your spouse's problems? Heck no. Not in any way, shape, or form.
But that's not the real question. The real question is...is it WORTH it?
When you look your problems in the face, when you work together with your spouse, you learn how to communicate and work through your problems together. You and your spouse grow as individuals and as a couple. And you learn to trust God and His plan, as well as how to trust you and your spouse.
Far too often, I've heard of people immediately taking the easy route and leaving at the first sign of a problem. And guess what they face in their next relationship? The exact same problems! Yep - they didn't learn anything by leaving and taking the easy route, so instead, they face the same stuff time and again. Because God puts us in the same situations over and over again until we LEARN from them! Shocking how that happens!
Now don't get me wrong...I'm not saying to stay if there is abuse or if there has been a series of trying to make it work but nothing is changing. What I am saying is to stick it out and work through it with your significant other...don't just run away at the first sign of a problem.
Sometimes God doesn't want us to have easy. Sometimes God wants us right in the middle of a storm so that we grow and learn to lean into Him when we need Him most. I know that I have...in the midst of everything going on, I have learned that His plan makes zero sense to me, but that it doesn't have to! He has me and my family and that's all I have to know.
What do you think? What would happen to marriages today if more people attempted to work things out before deciding to call it quicks? How would society be different? Look different?
Nothing in life is easy. Nothing worth having is easy.
If you are going through something difficult or are in hard times, know that you aren't alone. God is always there, even when you can't see Him or feel His presence.
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Have faith. Pray. And know you aren't alone.
I hope you have a beautiful week!
With love and wellness and lots of prayers,
They say it's a virtue. But me? I have yet to master it. At least in a lot of things in life.
I've found that I have patience for the big things, but when it comes to the little things, the daily things, I lose my patience very easily. Like for real...zero patience.
I've also found that when I pray for more patience, I am tested over and over again. Isn't it weird how that happens? Well, I guess weird is the wrong word. But when you pray for something, you are continually put in the situations to help you learn the lesson or achieve what you are praying for.
I really should learn to stop praying for patience.
In all seriousness, I know that my patience level can be greatly increased for those little, every day things. I lose my patience with the dogs, the kiddos (when they ask the same question for the millionth time), our chickens who keep jumping over the fence, LOL. You know...those little things that I can't control.
When it's something big, my ability to be patient and wait for the results is vastly improved! I don't understand why this is...the only thing I can think of is that I spend all of my patience on those big things that require lots of patience. So then I don't have enough left for the little things. But I wish I knew for sure.
I do know that I have to be better with my patience level. I can certainly tell when I'm tired or hungry (aka, hangry) that it's worse. But that isn't fair to anyone around me.
I can give you an example of this from Saturday morning: I had every intention of sleeping in; it was one of the few mornings I had this week to sleep in without waking up to an alarm. But at 415am, I woke up starving...like, couldn't fall back asleep I was so hungry starving. So I got up and had a banana, then had to use the bathroom (TMI? Sorry, LOL). Needless to say, I didn't fall back asleep until 5. No issues, right? Until 630...when my nephew woke up and decided it was time to get up and start the day. And wouldn't stop talking. And at 730, my doorbell rang. Our sleepover guest was being picked up. Let's just say I slammed open the door, stomped back into my bedroom to finish getting dressed and put essential oils on (I needed them), and was a straight up mean girl for about 10 minutes. I was so flippin' tired and angry and had ZERO patience with the world.
But let's be real...did I truly have to act like a total B simply because I didn't get to sleep in? Was it the end of the world? Will I remember this a year from now? 5 years from now? Is it worth making someone else feel poopy?
Not. Even. Remotely.
So yes, I know that patience is a virtue. And it is very much something I need to work on improving. So I will continue to pray for it. I will continue to work on it. And hope that one day I will be more Christ-like in that virtue.
For now, I am going to try to implement a 3-second rule. Instead of responding right away, I am going to take a deep breath and count to 3, allow myself to fully take in the situation, and then respond. I tend to respond off the cuff immediately and it isn't always the best or nicest response.
What about you all? What is something you use to be more patient? Or any of the other virtues there are. I would love your tips and tricks, because I need all the help I can get!
I hope you all have a beautiful week full of patience!
With love and wellness,
So there are always going to be things that happen in our lives where other people just don't understand. They'll judge you, they'll question your sanity, they'll even stop talking to you / being friends with you.
Now...my question is WHY? I don't understand why we all have to judge one another, why we have to question each other's decisions. Why we can't be KIND to one another, always. Even when we don't fully understand what's going on in each other's lives.
Let me be really blunt for a second. Nobody, and I mean nobody, has any idea what's going on in other people's lives. We see what others post on social media, we see and hear what people want us to, but do we really know what's going on? We sit back and judge...we think we know what's best for these people, but how can we possibly know what's best for someone else in THEIR lives?
The biggest point I have from this post is to be kind to one another! Always. We have no idea what's going on in each other's lives and sometimes a kind word, a hug, just being there and understanding is the best thing we can do for each other.
The judgment, the stares, the talking behind one another's backs. Is that what we've come to? Is that what God would want from us?
I'll admit...I used to be incredibly judgmental. I thought I knew best for everyone. Seriously...like I could possibly know what was best for everyone else in their own lives. I hardly know what's best for me sometimes!
When I realized that people have ZERO idea what goes on behind closed doors at my own house and in my relationships, it opened my eyes to the fact that I have ZERO idea what goes on behind closed doors at their house and in their relationships. It's funny how that works, huh?
I try my hardest to be understanding and to let other people live their own lives. Whatever decision they make in their lives is what's best for them. And I respect that.
All I ask in return is that my decisions, even if they aren't understood, that they are respected. Because let's be real, they are MY decisions. Allow me to live my life the way that is best for me, and I'll return the same respect to you. It really is that simple.
But somewhere along the way, that's gotten all mixed up. Instead, we judge one another, we like to think we know what's best for other people, and we think we are better than everyone else. When is that going to change?
Honest answer...it's going to change when WE make the conscious effort to STOP judging one another. To let others live their lives, unapologetically and without question.
Like the picture says, a good place to start is to stay humble, work hard, and be kind. It starts with each of us. So what do you say? Let's start a change! Let's get back to being KIND to one another!
I hope y'all have an amazing week! And that you are KIND to one another, always!
With love and wellness,
What are your goals? Hopes? Dreams? Your greatest aspirations?
Have you put the pursuit of those on hold? If so, why? I mean...really think about it. Why have you stopped pursuing your dreams?
Far too often, we let the world tell us that our goals are insane, unattainable, unrealistic, or just plain silly. So we just plod along with status quo...you know, same ol' same ol', day in, day out, even if it makes us unhappy.
Why do we do that? Why do we allow other people, outside forces, to dictate what we do with our lives? Let's be real...do those people or outside forces pay our bills? Do they determine our happiness?
I know I was guilty of this. For a long time. I thought I had to act a certain way, be a certain person, work a certain job, be with a certain person (or type of person), talk a certain way. You get the idea.
I even changed who I was depending on who I was dating at the time. My sister called me out on it several times. Sadly, this is true.
It took me awhile to come to terms with who I really was. Honestly, it took me awhile to like who I was. Once again, sadly, this is true too.
How many of you out there have felt this way at one point or another? How many of you feel that way now? Inadequate? Unworthy?
When people ask me how I changed my outlook on life and myself, the only answer I can give is through finding God again. I had searched high and low for outside forces, including men, to make me happy. But these things couldn't "make" me happy. And only when I found God and realized I was fearfully and wonderfully made, did my outlook change.
I stopped trying to be this being other people expected me to be and I started pursuing my dreams, my passions, my hopes and desires! I started out slow and a little hesitant, but have gained confidence and know that I would be unhappy if I was doing something other than what I'm currently doing.
It may look silly to other people; they may not ever understand it; and they may make fun of me. But the beauty of it is that I don't care, because the only opinion I care about is God's. And He loves me exactly as I am. How amazing is that?
My point in all this is that you should fearlessly pursue your dreams and passions; it's what you were put here to do! And it will shine through in your happiness and confidence and how you interact with everyone and everything in life!
Be fearless. And FEAR less! Just remember...fear has killed more dreams than failure ever has!
Start small if you must. But just START. It's been amazing watching my friends find their passions and at the same time, truly come into their own!
What have you been afraid to pursue? Let's see how we can get you started in the right direction :)
Have a beautifully, awesome week!
With love and wellness,
So here we are, halfway through 2017 (can you say holy crap??). Have you achieved your goals/New Year Resolutions that you set in January?
This is a good time to reset and review where you are, what you've accomplished, if you need to make adjustments, or if you need to set new goals!
I didn't set new year's resolutions this year, but I did have some HUGE goals for myself. I am definitely on track for where I want to be, but I've also had a few setbacks, as well. So I used this weekend to readjust, reset, renew.
I'm bound and determined to end 2017 with a bang! I love being able to look back and see what I've accomplished, as well as to look forward and see where I'm headed!
What about you? I'd love to hear some of the goals you set for yourself and to see where you are now, as well as where you're headed.
We may not be able to clearly see the path that is before us, but with goals and determination, you will get where you want to be! And of course, for me, I've noticed that prayers and asking God for specifically what I want and need has helped tremendously, as well.
2017 has been a life-changing year for me. In every sense of the word. I've found my passion with my work, I've re-examined my wants and needs, and I've learned that I am so much stronger than I ever thought possible. Yes, it's only been 6 months into 2017, but I know the next 6 months will be life-changing, as well.
My new goals? Continue on my path with my passions, Rodan+Fields and Crossfit; continue to learn and grow as a person, a woman, a business owner; and continue on my journey with Christ. I learn new things every day, and I'm excited to see how I end 2017. My team is growing, my confidence is growing, and my faith is growing. What more could I ask for?
I hope y'all have a beautiful 4th of July and an amazing week!
With love and wellness,