So I've been struggling with finding my motivation lately. I have a ton of stuff I need and/or want to do, but I haven't had any energy or motivation to do any of it.
Don't get me wrong...if I have it on my schedule, I get to it, no problem. But anything else and I just keep putting it off. And putting it off. And then putting it off some more.
I was searching for something this past weekend and found this picture. And it really hit home with me.
What is not started is never finished.
And that, my friends, has been the story of my life lately.
I've been dreading doing a few things on my list and by putting it off, I just keep dreading it. And usually, once I get to it, it really isn't that bad. And I end up getting finished with it much faster than I imagined. It's just that initial getting to it part that stumps me sometimes.
With everything I've had going on, I have been giving myself grace and allowing myself to take the extra rest, but I'm also ready to get my motivation back. To start feeling like myself and to not feel quite so run down all the time.
What are some tips you use to get your energy and motivation back?
I've done a few different things. I journal, especially when I really can't get things off my mind. I have been doing more yoga, which is actually insanely hard. My intent with it has been to focus on my breathing during it, which is helpful in shutting my brain off. I also have implemented a night time routine, which has helped my sleeping. I'm able to fall asleep faster and then stay asleep through the night, which hasn't happened in a long time. I also stopped drinking caffeine. It was causing me a lot of anxiety and of course, issues with my sleeping.
I feel like I should be more energized now because I'm sleeping more, but I think I'm actually more tired. Maybe it's my body's way of catching up on all the sleep I haven't been getting. I know I won't be instantly re-energized but it's frustrating when I feel like I'm doing all the "right" things to help me de-stress and relax.
I'd love to hear some of your favorite ways to motivate yourselves. To bring you energy and peace and motivation. Because I would love to find mine again!
I hope you all have a beautiful week!
With love and wellness,
I hope you all had a wonderful weekend and enjoyed your Father's Day!
Nick and I had a night away Saturday night, to celebrate his 30th birthday and Father's Day. And to get a night away, just the two of us. We rarely ever take the time for just me and him, so while it was short and sweet, it was very much needed and worth it.
So good news...we both turned our phones on silent and turned off the outside world. Bad news is we took zero pictures of our time away. Oops.
I think we often forget to do that. Actually put our phones down and away and enjoy being in the moment. We have to memorialize everything. Make sure we aren't missing anything so we can post it on social media. And yes, I'm guilty of it too.
I love having the memories. The pictures to look back on. But I've found I often miss things because my face is behind my phone, taking pictures. Then getting distracted because I got some sort of notification.
I loved having the time away with my husband this weekend. Just him and I, enjoying time away without any kids or fur babies or work or phones or anything distracting us.
We enjoyed a nice dinner out, then a couples massage. It was so peaceful and serene in the spa...we enjoyed some time alone while we were waiting in this amazing room. It was quiet and the chairs were so comfortable. I could've fallen asleep in the one I was in. But we played footsies instead :-)
This was our second couples massage together. It was nice to enjoy quality time together, to know we were treating ourselves, helping us to recover and move into our week refreshed.
I'd like to say we did something exciting afterwards, but nope. We showered and watched a movie laying in bed. We relaxed! No interruptions. No taking the dog out. No putting the baby to bed. Just him and I.
He and I are always on the go. It's non-stop from the moment we get up to the moment we go to bed. We work, study, build our businesses, raise a beautiful son, take care of our fur baby, work out, cook, clean up, try to relax. Day in and day out. And now we added house hunting into the mix!
We're living our best life together. And every now and again, it's nice to get away to relax, refresh, and renew. I think it's vital to do that.
So make the time. Set time aside for you. For you and your significant other. Get away from the every day grind. And enjoy it!
I hope you all have a beautiful week! And plan a little getaway. Plan something to look forward to!
With love and wellness,
There’s a fine line between being nice and being taken advantage of.
As I look back over the last several years of my life, as much as I hate to admit it, I’ve definitely had my moments where I’ve been taken advantage of. I’ve been too nice. Afraid to hurt people. Or of confrontation. Or maybe of both.
I didn’t want to ruffle any feathers, so to speak.
But in doing so, I silenced my voice. Put my wants and feelings on the back burner. And all this ended up doing was making me very anxious and upset. I’m sure it raised my blood pressure a notch or two too.
Yes, it is possible to voice your unhappiness without being confrontational or a total jerk. But it took me awhile to be comfortable even doing that.
Instead, I bottled it up and it often came out in a not so nice way. I blew up at the person, or something along those lines. And that’s definitely not healthy. Or productive. At all.
I’ve since learned, and am still learning, how to handle those situations in a better manner. I don’t have to be a door mat and let people take advantage.
I think back to my ex-husband, my roommate after him, and lastly, my tenants (who I am now done with, thankfully). Every one of those situations has something in common (other than me)... all of them were manipulative and took advantage of my giving nature, my heart, my “too niceness.” They took and took and took until I had nothing left to give.
Each in different ways, but I think people like that are naturally drawn to people like me. Because it happens all the time. They know exactly what to say to get what they want. And when YOU change because you’re sick of being treated that way, then you’re at fault.
Anyone out there familiar with what I’m talking about?
All I know is that each of these experiences have taught me a lot about who I am, what I want in life (and certainly don’t want), and how to stand up for myself without being a jerk. Again, I’m still a work in progress, but I no longer am a door mat.
If you’ve been through this and have advice for ways to improve and learn and grow, I’d love to hear them. I’m always interested in hearing how others have gotten through something similar.
I hope you all have a beautiful week. And are NOT a door mat for anyone!
With love and wellness,
This past week has been draining. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally.
It was the week leading up to selling the house I owned with my ex-husband.
It was the week we found out our little baby didn’t have a heartbeat.
It was the week where tragedy struck entirely too close to home.
Any and everything happened during this past week. And to say I’m tired would be an understatement.
It's been a week where I didn't think I could keep on going. Where I didn't know how I would put one foot in front of the other.
I'm pretty sure there was something wrong with the house every single day. And we close today and there's still something wrong. It has seriously been never ending. I spent my weekend there making sure it was move-in ready for the buyers and moving out my washer, dryer, and riding lawn mower. I had zero down time this weekend.
All of this on top of some terrible news. The Thursday before Memorial Day should have been our 8 week ultrasound. Instead, we found out there was an abnormality and potentially something wrong. So we went back in on Tuesday and found out there wasn't a heartbeat. My doctor had already scheduled a D&C for Wednesday morning, just in case.
We went into Memorial Day with hope, but when I started bleeding and cramping, I knew what was happening. Our bodies always know what to do when something is wrong.
She said it was a chromosomal abnormality. Absolutely nothing we could do. Our little baby wouldn't have survived either way. To say we were devastated would again, be an understatement.
We thought this would be our rainbow. Our chance. But only God knows why. And we're trusting that His plan is so much greater than ours.
So I spent my week recovering, but still moving forward, working, getting the house ready. Because what else could I do? The timing certainly wasn't right, but it never really is for something like this.
And then, to top off the week, we had a mass shooting in Virginia Beach, a city I used to live in, a city I work in, a city I called home for many years. Friends of friends died. A friend of mine's father passed away. It seemed like we couldn't catch a break.
I'm just sad this week. Sad and mourning the loss of so many things.
But I also know, despite the sad times, that there are good times ahead. I can finally close a chapter I've been in for far too long. With the selling of my house, I can officially be done with everything attached to my ex-husband. In fact, it is a rightful closure as it was two years ago yesterday that everything went down. I'm happy to wipe my hands clean of it and walk away.
I also have a plan for me and my future as a mother. No matter what happens, however, I know God is with me and for me. His plan for my life is so much greater than I could ever dream of. So I'm going to do what I can in my power and leave the rest to Him. Lots of prayer is involved in my plan, FYI.
So yes, it's Monday. But it's been a long week.
My hope is that as we enter June and the beautiful summer months, that I can let go of a lot of my stress (my yoga sessions start this week!) and anxiety and allow God to take 100% control. I don't know what the future holds, but I am at peace knowing it's with Nick and most important, with God at the helm.
Hug and kiss your loved ones. Never go to bed without saying I love you. Kiss and make up. Life is too short and there are too many tragedies these days to hold a grudge.
Love one another. Be kind to one another. Because you never know what a person is going through.
I love you all. Have a beautiful week.
With love and wellness,