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The Importance of a Honeymoon

3/20/2017

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So Scott and I are leaving on Saturday for our honeymoon. It is so very much needed! 

We got married in October and decided to wait until his transfer leave in March to go on our honeymoon. It was awesome only planning one thing at a time, but man oh man, do I wish we would have had a break after our wedding. 

We had a busy week going into our wedding, we had a whirlwind wedding day, an even more whirlwind day after wedding with the flooding and power outages everywhere, and we immediately went back into our normal day-to-day activities the week after. And we've been going ever since. 

​We really haven't had a moment to ourselves since then. Weeks fly by. Weekends fly by even faster. We are blessedly busy, but we desperately need this break. 

We've also been battling a shoulder injury (for Scott), which meant he was uncomfortable and not sleeping. Which meant I was uncomfortable and not sleeping. It has been a month, let's just say that. 

I don't really think this should be called the importance of a honeymoon; it's more so the importance of getting time away for one another, to be just the two of you...just husband and wife. 

Yes, we are married. Nothing changes that, honeymoon or otherwise. But we dove right back into being a family of 5, not really getting the chance to celebrate our wedding day and enjoying being husband and wife, just the two of us. 

So this...this next week is much needed, much anticipated, and if I would give you any piece of advice, go immediately after the wedding! 

There's all this build up with the wedding. You are planning, there's stress and anxiety, and all the what if's that could or could not happen. And then your wedding day is here, it's a whirlwind of a day, and POOF! Before you know it, it's over! 

And there's almost this let down feeling. Like, okay, what's next? Because you've had this huge event on your mind for weeks or months or years, depending on how long you've been engaged and planning, and now it's just over. 

I would have loved to go away with Scott immediately after and just relished that we did all that...we planned this huge event in 3 months, got married IN A HURRICANE, and had the time of our lives! That would have allowed us to decompress and just enjoy each other, plus the time to relax, rest, rejuvenate. 

So yes...it's almost 6 months later, but we are FINALLY getting that. And believe me, he and I are so ready! 

Regardless of whether you get to go on your honeymoon immediately after or a couple months, enjoy every single second of it. And take a day or two right after your wedding to just enjoy the two of you. Believe me, you will want it. I know I did. 

I hope you all have a wonderful couple weeks. I'm taking a hiatus next week, but will be back the following week to tell you about all the fun we had :)

With love and wellness,
​Whitney
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Communication...

3/13/2017

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I know I talk about this a lot, but seriously...communication really is key. Especially as you are planning your wedding. I know this, and Scott and I still had loads of communication issues, especially the week before our big day. 

For some reason, I seem to think he can read my mind. That he should just know what I'm thinking and what I want, even when I don't say anything. Are all women like this? Because it certainly would make life easier if men could read our minds! Ha! 

So...here's the thing with our wedding. We got married in our backyard. And months prior, we knew there was stuff that needed to be done to ensure the outside of our house looked the way we wanted it.

Well...you know how that works. Life gets in the way, and it rained the entire week he took off to get a lot of stuff done. So needless to say, he didn't get much done prior to the week of our wedding. 

So instead of helping me with the stuff inside the house and prepping for the wedding, he was running around the week prior trying to get all the outside stuff done. And instead of me saying something to him, I just let it stew and fester in my head.

It also didn't help that he was shifted to night check for that week so he was working from about 1 to 10-ish each night. And his mom was coming into town that Wednesday. 

Here we are on Tuesday...he's getting ready for work after doing whatever he was doing outside, and I exploded. I held it in long enough. I mean...I needed help on the inside of the house, prepping for his mom's arrival, plus we had the kids so I was running around picking them up and ensuring they got to where they needed to go. 

And instead of asking for help, I assumed that he knew I needed help. 

Oh man is all I have to say. 

All of our fights have been because we didn't keep that line of communication open. Once we sit down and talk about (or explode at one another), we are back on the same page and everything is fine. The trick is learning to talk about it BEFORE the big explosions! 

We are definitely getting better about it, but man oh man, that one was a doozy. We resolved it and were fine before he even left for work, but still. It certainly wasn't any fun. 

We also had a bit of a fight the night of our rehearsal dinner...once again, because we weren't communicating with one another. That one was resolved very quickly without a huge blow-up (thankfully), and we enjoyed our wedding day, drama and argument-free! 

My takeaway from this and for you is to make sure you are communicating with your significant other. There's nothing worse than assuming they know what you're thinking, and vice versa, and having a big fight because of it. 

Scott knew I had wanted the stuff outside done; however, I didn't want him focusing solely on that the week prior to our wedding. We were having house guests and a ton of people in our house that week. I needed the help inside. So once again, we were operating on our own wants and needs, based on what we thought the other person wanted or needed. 

Ugh. It can be an ugly cycle. 

Don't let this be you. Ask your fiancé for help. Let them know where you could use the extra hand. The week before is going to fly by, just as the wedding day does, so make sure you aren't spending your time arguing with your future spouse. 

Yes, it may be hard to ask for help...do it anyways. I promise, it will lead to smoother sailing as you head into your big day! 

Have an awesome week! And happy wedding planning! 

With love and wellness,
​Whitney
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Wedding Prep Frenzy...

3/6/2017

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Does wedding prep have you feeling like this? ^^^^

Believe me. I was there. For a couple weeks before the wedding, but more so the week of. 

You see...I got married October 8, 2016. You know. Hurricane Matthew day. 

The whole week before, people were asking me what we were planning on doing. Were we still getting married? What was our Plan B, and Plan C, and Plan D, etc.?

So my stress level kept going up. Until I had a HUGE blowout the Tuesday before. HUGE. 

But then...something amazing happened. My now husband and I had it out (yes...unfortunately, we did). But he helped me see that no matter what was going to happen, we were going to get married that Saturday. It didn't matter if the only people there were me, him, and our 3 kids... We. Were. Getting. Married. 

And THAT, in the end, was the important part! 

So let me give you a couple tips to help you get through the wedding prep without pulling all your hair out. As a caveat, I am not an expert, but I've lived through it. And we planned our wedding in 3 months!!

I know you can read this over and over again, but believe me when I tell you that stressing over how many people are coming, whether you have enough food or not, how the weather is going to be is POINTLESS. You can't control the weather, so there's no sense worrying about it. And leave the worrying about how much food there will be to the caterer! They are the experts! I stressed about this and we were eating leftovers for a WEEK afterwards!! We had WAY more than enough food!!! 

And that whole number of guests coming? Invite who you want there, dependent on the total number of guests you and your soon to be spouse have decided on. Send the invites, wait for the response cards, and then realize that even when people have said YES, they may not show up. And for those that didn't respond or said NO, they may show up. So in the end, it all evens out anyway. 

Here's another tip that planning a wedding in 3 months helped me stick to: Make decisions and move on! Don't second guess yourself or go back and forth with what you want. We selected our caterer very quickly and left the details up to them...it was gorgeous, and the food was DELICIOUS! I changed my mind 3 times with the florist, but once I made the decision, we stuck with it and didn't worry about it again. I found my dress after 3 visits to dress shops; and once it was selected, I didn't look at any other gowns or wonder WHAT IF. I knew I had found MY dress!

Bridesmaids' dresses were easy...I wanted dark purple and told them to select one that was long and of similar shades of purple. That's all I asked for...and they were GORGEOUS! Honestly, picking out the men's attire was harder! Scott and I went back and forth about the colors of the ties and vest, which was actually pretty funny! We knew we wanted gray suits with a vest and no jacket, but then it was back and forth on the ties. Thankfully, Men's Wearhouse made it easy with the colors so we didn't spend too long fighting! 

Oh...and about centerpieces? Don't stress out over what they look like. Nobody's going to remember what they look like anyways. I stressed myself out wanting to make my own and kept changing my mind and flipping back and forth. Thankfully, my matron of honor had recently gotten married and had beautiful centerpieces that she let us use. Once that decision was made, I didn't look back! 

Stick with your choices. You'll drive yourself crazy going back and forth, not to mention driving your soon to be spouse, bridal party, and family crazy! I know it sounds easier said than done, but trust me, it will help keep you sane. There are so many little details to tend to, so make the decisions, then move on to the next! And check those bad boys off your list!! 

Here's another HUGE tip that I struggle with in general, let alone when it came to planning our wedding. ASK. FOR. HELP. 

I hate looking or feeling helpless, and for some reason, asking for help makes me feel like I can't do it all alone. But duh...I CAN'T!!! There was so much going on with family and friends coming into town, trying to figure out who all was coming with the weather, getting the house ready (since we got married in the backyard), and ensuring all the vendors were still coming with the impending storm. 

And in the end, the only thing that matters is that you are marrying your best friend. It doesn't matter what the weather looks like, how many people show up (yes, it's nice to have all your guests there, but you won't have time to spend with them like you want to anyways), or what the centerpieces look like...at the end of the day, you will be husband and wife (or husband and husband, wife and wife...whatever the case may be). 

Yes...right around the start of our photos, the rain started. And it pretty much rained the entire afternoon and into the evening. But we had a BLAST. We laughed and joked around and had the best time of our lives! 

The most important tip...enjoy the planning process. And enjoy your wedding day. It will all fly by so fast, and it will be over in the blink of an eye! 

I hope you take something away from this...and of course, message me if you want to chat or have any questions. We all have different experiences with wedding planning, but I can tell you I was happy it was planned and accomplished within 3 months! Done and done :) And now we are happily married with beautiful memories and pictures to remember our day! 

Have an awesome week! 

With love and wellness,
Whitney
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© 2015 by 3DubWellness. All rights reserved.

Please Note: I do not provide the services of a licensed dietician or nutritionist, information received should not be seen as medical or nursing advice, and is not meant to take the place of seeing licensed health professionals.
Photo used under Creative Commons from Premnath Thirumalaisamy