So if you've been following me for awhile, you know I like to be in control. Like, I want to know what's going on, when, how, why, where. Long and short of it...I like to be in control.
And every so often, I need the reminder that I am not in control. I've never been in control nor will I ever be. And every so often, it comes in the form of something big. Something I don't necessarily like.
Because a lesson wouldn't be a lesson if it were fun, right?
And without fail, letting go is exactly what I need to do and what leads me exactly where I'm supposed to be.
There are truths we live in...truths we want so badly to be true. And we fight to keep them as so.
But in the end, are they really truths you want to stay in?
I've had so many things happen in the past year and a half. And I wanted nothing more than to change the truth I was living in. But where I ended up was so much better than what I could have imagined.
They helped me grow. They helped me succeed. And they helped me become the person I am today.
And I'm once again in a situation where I want to be in control. I want to know when certain things are going to happen, how it's going to work out, what the end result will be. And I'm once again humbly reminded that I have absolutely no control over any of it.
I have to put my trust and faith in God that things will work out exactly as they're supposed to. No matter how much I try to fight it or change it, there's nothing I can do to make any of it different. I have to let go and let life happen.
So I do this with a lot of praying. And a lot of faith. And knowing that I've been through a whole heck of a lot and have always come out on top.
I'm not saying it's easy. But I can promise you it's way better than stressing about it and being overly anxious about the outcome. Because in the end, we can't change the outcome. All we can change is how we react to it.
So that's my goal. Let go. And let life happen. Enjoy living in the moment. Not stress about what may or may not happen. And have fun doing so!
Do you need help with this? Because it's always better to have an accountability partner. And someone to talk to when things get tough. You know...other than God :)
I hope you all have a beautiful week. And learn to let go just a little.
With love and wellness,
So I woke up Sunday morning with the "Baby Shark Doo Doo Doo" song in my head. I'm not sure why because I've never actually heard the song (thankfully, I'm told).
But it made me think about how many people talk about it or share memes about it on social media. And it made me think about all the other things we share on Facebook, from restaurant recommendations to recipes to wine and chocolate recommendations. I mean, we literally share everything with people, especially when we love it or believe in it.
Yet, when it comes to sharing our businesses, people get annoyed or irritated or say, "Not another post about this!"
Why is that? Why can we share other types of things we love but not our businesses?
Okay - I get it. Some people are over board with it and cold message (aka, spam) people, but not everyone does. Not everyone is like that. And it can get a little overwhelming when you're scrolling through and see the EXACT SAME post over and over again because copy and paste is a real thing.
I get it. I promise, I do.
But here's the thing. For people in business like that, this is their love and passion and livelihood. For me, this is what I believe in. And I can't help but share it.
These businesses pay their bills. Pay for their kids' sports or dance classes. Pay for college tuition. Pay for vacations. Help fund charities or foundations.
These businesses are supporting families.
So why do we shame them? Why do we make them feel bad about their posts?
Let's do something different. Let's support one another. Let's help build each other up. Let's be the real MVPs for one another.
Yes, it can get annoying to get the same message again and again, especially when you've never talked to the person. I've gotten them. And I'm sure I sent them when I was first starting out. But instead of being rude back or shaming them publicly on social media, how about we educate them? Wish them luck? Help them be better for the next time?
We aren't in competition with each other, ladies and gents. We should support one another and build each other up. Let's help each other out. Support each other's dreams.
Have a beautiful week, everyone. And stop hating on each other. Love one another. Be good to one another. The world needs more of it.
With love and wellness,
We are a world that wants instant gratification. We want results now. We want to reach our goals now. We don't want to wait. And a lot of times, we don't want to work for it. Or if we do and we are set back for whatever reason, we give up.
We want instant results. Instant weight loss. Instant success. Instant relationship success. Instant athletic abilities. Instant <fill in the blank with whatever you want>.
It often takes years to get to where you are unhappy, overweight, out of shape, whatever the case may be. Yet, we want to instantly reverse that in a blink of an eye.
We want to workout one time, eat healthy for a couple days, start a business....and POOF...we are successful and healthy and have lost weight!
Believe me, I am guilty of this too. I want to hurry things along and be where I want to be without a whole lot of time and/or effort.
But I also know it doesn't work that way.
I know that everything that is worth having or achieving is also worth working for. And yes, some things may come instantly or faster than others, but they will all still require work.
I started my health coaching business almost 5 years ago now (I can't even believe that!) and I don't wonder why it's not further along than it is. I focused on it for a year or so and then found something else to focus on. I've just recently gotten back into it and have been very successful since putting my time and energy into it.
I know...shocking, right?
But we don't want to believe or admit that. We don't want to do the hard work that is often necessary to achieve success. Because what comes with that is usually some failures. And we all hate failing.
In fact, I used to be afraid of failing. Which is silly. Because failing is inevitable.
Yes, you read that right.
Without failures, you wouldn't know what does and doesn't work. You aren't going to get things right on the first try. Or at least most of us don't. And when that something doesn't work, you move on to the next.
Failures are great growth opportunities. Cross out what doesn't work and move on. Don't give up!
Remember, success and getting and seeing results is a long game. It takes time and effort and work. Put in the work and effort and you will see results.
Need help reaching those goals? I'm your girl! Personal training. Health coaching. Nutrition advice. Skincare. Let's talk! I'd love to help you get where you want to be!
Have a beautifully blessed week!
With love and wellness,
I've struggled with my decision to write this post. I've struggled with how much of it to share...or even if I should share at all. Not many people know this part of my story, but I think it's time for me to share and be open, just as I have been throughout my journey.
You see, all of us are guilty of sharing only the good parts of our story. The loving, happy parts of our story. But behind the scenes, there are always the not so good parts. The sad parts. The I've cried my eyes out for hours part.
Before I met Nick, I had come to terms with not having any children. I thought it was my destiny to be an aunt and a god-mother and a step-mother, but I had learned to be okay with not having my own children.
I don't know how, after wanting kids my whole life, I was okay with it. But I was.
Until Nick and I got pregnant in June 2018.
It was a complete surprise. An accident. Something neither of us were expecting. I was excited and nervous and scared. How the heck were we going to get through that?
But I was ready. Or at least I thought I was. As ready as I could be, anyhow.
We found out pretty early on as my cycles are very regular. So I wasn't that far along when I started bleeding a few days after the positive pregnancy test. I didn't know what else to do so we went to the ER. And when we found out it was, in fact, a miscarriage, I started crying and realized just how much I wanted that baby. My own baby...with Nick.
I know it was early on, but that still hit me pretty hard. But I also knew that wasn't the best time for either of us. We weren't yet living together, I was still going through my divorce, and I was super stressed with my living situation and trying to figure out how to make ends meet. I know everything happens for a reason, but I was still sad at losing the possibility of our first baby together.
By this point, Nick and I knew we wanted to be together...to have a family together. But we decided we weren't going to try, accidentally or on purpose, to have another baby until after my divorce was finalized and he and I were married.
But...best laid plans.
I found out I was pregnant again in September. Again, another complete surprise. Not trying, but we are apparently very good at getting pregnant.
And again, not the best timing, but I was ready. I was STILL going through my divorce, I didn't have health insurance, and Nick and I were (obviously) not married. But I was insanely happy.
I thought things were fine. I had the normal symptoms, was doing alright...everything was going well.
Until mid-November. I started bleeding. Again.
Another trip to the ER because it was progressively getting worse. I wasn't in pain, but I knew something was wrong.
After the ultrasound, we got devastating news. I was supposed to be around 12 weeks, but my uterus was measuring at 7 weeks. And there was no heartbeat...and no baby. There wasn't anything. It was, once again, devastating news. How could my body betray me like that? I'd looked, felt, thought I was pregnant for two months at that point!
So I decided to do some research, because that's how I am. I wanted to know what had happened, even if there wasn't an actual answer.
When a pregnancy ends with nothing in the uterus, is it called a blighted ovum. It's when the egg doesn't attach itself to the uterus. There was something wrong so the body rejects the pregnancy. It was difficult to deal with, but I came to terms with it because we hadn't lost an actual baby...just the thought of a baby. I know it may sound weird, but that's how I thought of it. How I learned to be okay with it.
The actual miscarriage part of it was terrible. It's not anything I'd ever like to go through again. Or wish upon anyone else. And I've spent more time in an ER because of these things than I'd ever like to again. It took longer than I care to admit to get everything out and to be cleared from a doctor.
In January, after Nick and I got married, we decided we were going to actively try.
It turns out, we have no issue getting pregnant. That part seems to come really easy for us. I found out, once again really early, that I was pregnant. But it didn't last long. I started bleeding a few days later.
At this point, I knew there was something going on with me. I mean, I'm no spring chicken. And I've never tried or accidentally been pregnant before. So all of this is a new experience for me.
So yes, we are seeing a doctor so we can figure out what is happening. And how Nick and I can have our family.
A few of my friends and family know about this. And like I said at the beginning, I struggled with deciding to share. But I shouldn't be embarrassed about having miscarriages. It isn't something I did or didn't do. And it's something we don't often talk about. We deal with...or try to deal with it...on our own. We think we're the only ones going through it. But it's so much more common than we know.
I'm excited for this next part of Nick and I's journey. I've decided to not be scared, because God has it in His control. Whatever is meant to happen, will happen. And my anxiety or fear isn't going to change that. So I pray. And I release all of my fears to God.
I'll keep you all updated throughout my journey as I hope it one day helps someone else going through something similar. Know you're not alone. And it's okay to grieve and feel loss...because it is a loss.
I love you all and am so thankful for all your support throughout my journey. Have a beautiful week.
With love and wellness,