Looking back in my journal, I realized that Scott and I started talking about this time last year. Now, had you (or anyone) told me even a few weeks prior that we would be back in each other's lives, I would have laughed at you.
I can remember being terrified. Terrified of going down the same path again. Terrified of what my friends and family would say. Terrified that my feelings for him were as strong as ever. Terrified that I would get hurt again.
We didn't tell a whole lot of people that we were talking or hanging out. But let me tell you, we did a whole lot of talking. About our previous attempt at dating. At where we were in life at that moment. What we wanted in life and a relationship. About our fears and concerns.
And then he went to the boat for a couple weeks (thank you, navy). I wrote in my journal how happy I was that he was going to be gone for a couple weeks without a sure fire way to communicate. I wrote how I needed the time away from him to figure out my heart and feelings and what I wanted from him/for us. I knew that I didn't want to go down the same path as the last time we dated.
Three days into his trip, I got a text. He had figured out how to communicate with me from the boat. After three days of not talking, not hearing from him, and a crap ton of praying about it, I knew this was a sign. I wasn't just a convenience or someone to pass the time. He missed me as much as I missed him.
We don't know when we technically started dating again. So we say around the beginning of September. So here we are, together a year. And getting married in a month.
We may not have had the most conventional relationship, but I wouldn't change any part of it. It's taught us both so much about ourselves and each other. We grew from our experiences the first time we dated. And our relationship now is one I am proud to be a part of.
I truly believe God led us back together and down this crazy path we've been on. And God is the reason we are stronger and closer than ever.
A few weeks back, I posted a picture that said, "Without God, I am hopeless. With God, I am fearless." This is so very much true. I was terrified when Scott and I started talking again. But I put it in God's hands and prayed about it and here we are.
Now, I'm not saying we haven't had our arguments or moments, but we are no longer scared of what the future holds. Together and with God, we are capable of any and everything.
I'd say the proof of that is this past year and the many changes our family has been through. And how much stronger we are because of them.
I love you, Scott. Happy anniversary. I look forward to our future together and to many more anniversaries!
Happy Labor Day! And have an awesome week!
With love and wellness,