You know that feeling you get when you read a good book that just touches your soul? The feeling that your life will never be the same?
That just happened to me. On Saturday, I finished reading "Fearless," a book about the life and ultimate sacrifice of Navy SEAL Adam Brown. It made me think. Made me reevaluate my life and choices. It made me laugh. And made me cry. A lot.
When I first started going back to church, before I asked Jesus Christ back into my heart and life, I always felt like an outcast. Like I didn't belong there. Like people could just look at me and know I wasn't supposed to be there.
And truthfully, there are still times when I've been at church and felt like an outsider. But reading Adam's story touched me in such a way, especially how open and honest he wanted his family and friends to be in telling his story, that it made me realize it's selfish and silly to think that way.
Being at church isn't about ME. It never has been. I'm so thankful for this man, who has touched me so deeply that I know I will never be the same. He was so selfless and giving, yet so incredibly hard on himself for even the smallest setback. I know he touched so many people's lives, not only in his life, but in his death, as well.
I don't know why I purchased this book or what led me to finding it, but I count my blessings that I did. I know that yes, I am a sinner, but God loves me exactly as I am. I don't have to prove myself to Him or to anyone else. All I can do is strive to be more Christ-like in my life and not focus selfishly on my wants and needs.
I always say I want to give back and volunteer and donate more, but there are always excuses. I don't have enough time. I don't know anyone there. I don't know how to get started. But again, those are just excuses.
I know I posted about it before, but Scott and I recently started going to Charity United Methodist Church in Virginia Beach. I feel more at home there in the first four weeks of service than I have at any other church in a long while. The pastor, the other members, everyone has been so welcoming and open and willing to help with everything. I think we've found our home at this church. And I love when the kids ask to stay with us over the weekends so they can go to church with us!
There are also a few opportunities to help out at the church that I plan on inquiring about and starting to spend some of my time there. Because there is always enough time. And I know I have been incredibly blessed in this life, and to not give back and to help out others would be so incredibly selfish. And I don't want to live that way anymore.
Thank you to Eric Blehm for authoring this book, and to Adam's wife and parents and siblings for letting us know Adam and his selflessness. Reading some of the letters the author received showed me just how many people Adam has inspired and touched.
And thank you to Adam for renewing my faith and grace in God, for reminding me I am not alone, and that I don't have to be perfect to be loved for exactly who I am.
If you get the chance, get this book as soon as you can and start reading it. I seriously couldn't put it down.
I hope you have a beautiful week. A blessed week. One full of love and life and laughter.
With love and wellness,
PS - Adam worked with a lot of the guys who were killed on August 6, 2011...the same guys we do the workout 31 Heroes for every year. It really hit home for me and made me appreciate being a part of that workout this and every year.